Halfway Point!

How is it week 9 already!?? Time flies when you're training for a marathon! I've been so busy with life I'm just glad I've been able to get my training done! My runs have not been stellar at all, my Achilles tendinitis is the worst it's ever been, and has been slowing me down big time! I'm anticipating that my finishing time will be much slower than last years marathon, and I've let that idea beat me in the head mentally. The slower I run the more and more I feel like a total failure, but then I talk to myself and try to remember that the time was never important to me in the first place, only finishing was! Still it's really hard and it's affected my diet, I haven't really gained but I haven't lost either, I'm pretty hungry lately but that's no surprise with the training I've been doing, but I'm not eating the best foods either, I've been trying but then I'll get discouraged and end up eating what I shouldn't. 

It's excuses but I'm working on it, and still getting lots of exercise in! My mileage fell short of what I wanted to accomplish in August, but I did spin every Friday, and have incorporated kickboxing or Pound from Crunch gym into my training. I felt stronger physically but mentally I'm fighting myself everyday. 

Depression is not easy to talk about but it's there, and I'm coping with it the best I can, the endorphins I get from exercise help tons, I just have to face the food demon that plagues my heart when I'm really feeling down and out. I know I can get over it but it's just harder with the hunger training brings lately. 

I decided after the marathon I will not be running another one for a few years. I don't know that I'll run anymore half marathons either, I think the pressure of constantly having a big race to prep for is burning me out mentally and affecting me physically too. This training season has shown me that I do love to exercise and I do love to run, but I love doing whatever I want more. When I'm training for a race I have to stick to a plan, and everything else in my life and it makes fitting in other workouts harder, when I'm running 4 days a week. I want to go back to the way I was before I tried long distance running, doing all the workouts I wanted, and running when I felt like it. I'll still race but maybe a few times a year, and I'll work on getting my Achilles stronger and try getting faster at shorter distances! 

But for now I'm going to make the best of the rest of my training and try to enjoy the process, and know that the NYC marathon is still an amazing journey to be on and be part of. 9 weeks to go, that's it! It will be here before I know it, and I just pray that I have a wonderful experience and relish the moments. 

Thank you to my readers that have stuck by me, I'm not perfect at all, but I just try to live as healthy and happy as I can! And I'll try to post more in the weeks leading up to the big day! Til next time! Xoxo!